My girls

I am surrounded by a plethora of amazing women: my roommate, Autumn, who I dearly love. Brittany, my other roommate, engaged, will be a psychologist like her father whom she loves. Chelsea, sweetest girl in the world. Rachel, crazy outgoing young life leader who LOVES pink and is going to marry her best friend even though he doesn't know it. Kjel (pronounced Chel) the former gymnast, absolutely beautiful, genuine, and spunky. Alicia, the nursing student at SPU, stunningly gorgeous and unbelievably goofy. Rachael, just back from Europe, studying History, a singer and flamenco dancer. Shanon, the swedish beauty with an endearing lisp and amazing jewelry. She brings pastries home from her coffee shop for us girls to nibble. Ashley, one of my favorites, an actress, just got an agent, jet black hair, hates her pimples and mom pooch just like me. There is so much more to each of these girls and I know it. I just can't get to it. I am either too tired to try, to gone to hang out, or too shy to simply ask one of them to coffee and not be scared they'd think I was odd. How silly is that. It's almost like I feel so defeated even before I try to hang out. But I am inside a well of amazing women, why can't I just dive in and enjoy? Tonight was a barbecue for our group of houses, and later there is a concert at the house across the street, then everybody is going salsa dancing. Did I leave the barbecue early? Yes. Did I need to? No. I left before things got awkward. Will the concert be fun? Yes. Will I go? Yes, but only to drop by, I wouldn't want to feel awkward. Salsa dancing, yes, fun, no, I won't go, why? I work in the morning. Sorry girls. I am too busy to be a friend, to tired to invest. This is what saddens me.