YOU MADE IT! You didn't get lost. :)

I have decided that I can be covert no more. The reason to have a blog is to share what is going on in life, to allow people to share experiences, thoughts; to just share life.

As many know, life has not been easy lately. I think that every day I die a little after finding hope in a relationship that will never be good. You know, I think he values me, but then he just does something else to absolutely crush me. And so, this change of address is to get away from him. I can be evasive no longer. It's time to be true, to be real and to say out loud. . .

Chris, you hurt me so bad then, and it just seems like you're gonna hurt me every single day, aren't you? I am trying to get over you and it kills me to see you look at me like you're not over me, when I know you probably never even meant half of the things you said. Sure you cared about me, a ton, you say. But where are the actions to back that? I have no more faith in you. I have now given up. And I'm still not okay. But I care about you so very much that I can't even think straight. I miss you. I miss us. At least pain lets me know I am alive.

So there it is. It's real. I look forward to getting back to myself. I pray it will be soon.